Post by UWL Office on Jun 14, 2022 23:16:59 GMT -5
The show comes on the air. The picture scans across the crowd.
The picture cuts to the announce desk, where we see Cliff Morris and Logan Acker, ready for action.
Cliff Morris - Hello, wrestling fans. Welcome to UWL Saturday Night we're here for a loaded night of action. Tonight we'll going to see Chris Constantine, Jr. defending the UWL World Championship against UWL Television Champion Lauren Parker. We will also see the rematch, Robb Daniels taking on Hammerstein. Joining me as always, Logan Acker.
Logan Acker - Tonight's card could sell out any arena anywhere. It's a cliche, but I believe it to me true.
Cliff Morris - Before we go up to the ring. Let's head from the United States Champion, Lash Donohue!
Lash Donohue [voice]:
"Hahahahahahaha.."
The screen is darkened, and this is what makes the familiar all-knowing laughter all the more maddening for the viewer. The host of this media offering continued to laugh for a good minute before catching his breath..
Lash Donohue [voice]: "I see, said the blind man as he pissed directly into the wind. It's all coming back to me now!"
The room grew brighter for just a second, and the viewer can see the snarling, grinning face of Lash Donohue pressed against a chain link fence as he clung to the top, before the image once more faded to black and the voice-over continued..
Lash [voice]: "I just don't get it, ya know.."
As Lash speaks, several of his UWL milestone moments, drenched in sepia, provide context..
Lash [voice]: "The 'bad guys', as the media likes to refer to some of us? Damn. Some of us look great when stacked up against your so-called 'heroes', that much is true!"
Lash's first appearances in UWL play through. It's pretty evident that the fans dislike this arrogant young man just a little more every time they see him, and he appears to delight in this..
Lash [voice]: "Some of us are absolutely hated just for being real.."
We can see Lash's moment at Access Denied where he conquered Talia Areano and became the United States champion, and also some footage of Lash ripping a sign out of a young fan's hands and eating it..
Lash [voice]: "While others? They're getting SO much love for being fake.."
Several somewhat blinding flashes disrupt what's happening on the screen, as a set of naked flourescent bulbs are jolted to life and they struggle in their poorly wired fitting before finally illuminating Lash Donohue pacing back and forth in the hallway of the arena.
Lash Donohue: "SUP, ALBANY?"
Lash is all suited up, ready for his match. The US championship as usual, hangs out of his tights. Most fans don't buy the interaction here, they merely continue to make their disapproval known. Albeit, a small portion of the crowd cheer for the mention of their town alone..
Lash Donohue: "Oh right. Gotta..tawk..slower.. here!"
Crowd: "OHHH. BOOOOO!"
Lash Donohue: "Fuck you, Albany.."
A loud BOO erupted in the stands from the second that the real-time portion of Lash's segment came into play, and it only grows louder with each passing second as Lash looked dead eye into the lens - at the fans- and delivered a menacing, twisted grin/snarl hybrid before he spoke..
Lash Donohue: "Ultimate Wrestling League, you should ALL quit ya freakin' belly aching, already! Y'all finally get a soundly skilled, hardworking US champion who doesn't talk out his ass.."
Lash absorbs the hate that filters in, closing his eyes for a second. He grinned sarcastically, his arms spread wide, gesturing for Georgia to get louder. They unhappily oblige..
Lash Donohue: "Finally y'all got yaselves a US champion who isn't some backwater mud show outlaw wannabe freakin' fish outta water.."
Lash laughs heartily as Albany also BOO him heartily. It only got louder as Lash grinned and used his middle finger to wipe a fake laughter tear from the corner of his eye..
Lash Donohue: "Finally, this fickle redneck ass company with these fickle redneck ass fans has a technically sound, charismatic workhorse champion who knows what day it is, and you cousin f.."
The BOOing had grown to almost nuclear levels, but Lash caught himself. He closed his eyes, centering himself before he continued..
Lash Donohue: "Grrr. You STILL wanna complain, you assholes?! Fine! This is why I call y'all out! This is why I called out Areano!!"
Lash grinned cockily, taking up the US title and placing it over his shoulder, slapping the plate proudly several times..
Lash Donohue: "And this is why I call out YOU, Erik Holland!"
Lash's face grows cold. Serious.
Lash Donohue: "You goddamn RIGHT I thought you were cool once, Holland. Of freakin' course I think a dood who plays his own game no matter what and doesn't give a rat's ass is somewhat inspirational.."
The fans had grown sedate while Lash's demeanor grew ever more serious..
Lash Donohue: "I was once naive as two motherfuckers.."
There's a faint BOO as the corner of Lash's mouth broke into a sarcastic grin..
Lash Donohue: "You were too good to acknowledge my rookie self, Holland. Not so much as a freakin' HELLO in return. In fact, I didn't get a damn bit of acknowledgement from you until you came into UWL, the so-called ultraviolet 'legend' is returning to what is currently MY house...until you realised that you're coming face to face with ME, Erik. Only NOW is my STILL rookie self good enough for your fucking majesty to acknowledge! Eat shit, my friend!"
Lash's eyes grew cold once more as he held the gleaming title close the camera..
Lash Donohue: "Well uh uhh! If you think for a second that ANY of your hollow interaction with me did you one iota of good, shove the concept up your ass! You really are steaming hot garbage, Erik Holland. You'll thankfully never come close to touching my United states championship ever again!"
The scene began to fade out here as Lash began to shadow box in the hallway, his call not being far off. Of course there is still a steady BOO filtering in from the stands..
Lash Donohue: "You're a bigger shitbag than I could ever aspire to be, and your reign of Erik-squeaks-by mediocrity is up tonight. The Bury-Go-Round tour ain't stopping here.."
With a final cackle of cocky laughter and a final angry BOOO from the Georgian fans, this segment fades.
The picture cuts to the announce desk, where we see Cliff Morris and Logan Acker, ready for action.
Cliff Morris - Hello, wrestling fans. Welcome to UWL Saturday Night we're here for a loaded night of action. Tonight we'll going to see Chris Constantine, Jr. defending the UWL World Championship against UWL Television Champion Lauren Parker. We will also see the rematch, Robb Daniels taking on Hammerstein. Joining me as always, Logan Acker.
Logan Acker - Tonight's card could sell out any arena anywhere. It's a cliche, but I believe it to me true.
Cliff Morris - Before we go up to the ring. Let's head from the United States Champion, Lash Donohue!
Lash Donohue [voice]:
"Hahahahahahaha.."
The screen is darkened, and this is what makes the familiar all-knowing laughter all the more maddening for the viewer. The host of this media offering continued to laugh for a good minute before catching his breath..
Lash Donohue [voice]: "I see, said the blind man as he pissed directly into the wind. It's all coming back to me now!"
The room grew brighter for just a second, and the viewer can see the snarling, grinning face of Lash Donohue pressed against a chain link fence as he clung to the top, before the image once more faded to black and the voice-over continued..
Lash [voice]: "I just don't get it, ya know.."
As Lash speaks, several of his UWL milestone moments, drenched in sepia, provide context..
Lash [voice]: "The 'bad guys', as the media likes to refer to some of us? Damn. Some of us look great when stacked up against your so-called 'heroes', that much is true!"
Lash's first appearances in UWL play through. It's pretty evident that the fans dislike this arrogant young man just a little more every time they see him, and he appears to delight in this..
Lash [voice]: "Some of us are absolutely hated just for being real.."
We can see Lash's moment at Access Denied where he conquered Talia Areano and became the United States champion, and also some footage of Lash ripping a sign out of a young fan's hands and eating it..
Lash [voice]: "While others? They're getting SO much love for being fake.."
Several somewhat blinding flashes disrupt what's happening on the screen, as a set of naked flourescent bulbs are jolted to life and they struggle in their poorly wired fitting before finally illuminating Lash Donohue pacing back and forth in the hallway of the arena.
Lash Donohue: "SUP, ALBANY?"
Lash is all suited up, ready for his match. The US championship as usual, hangs out of his tights. Most fans don't buy the interaction here, they merely continue to make their disapproval known. Albeit, a small portion of the crowd cheer for the mention of their town alone..
Lash Donohue: "Oh right. Gotta..tawk..slower.. here!"
Crowd: "OHHH. BOOOOO!"
Lash Donohue: "Fuck you, Albany.."
A loud BOO erupted in the stands from the second that the real-time portion of Lash's segment came into play, and it only grows louder with each passing second as Lash looked dead eye into the lens - at the fans- and delivered a menacing, twisted grin/snarl hybrid before he spoke..
Lash Donohue: "Ultimate Wrestling League, you should ALL quit ya freakin' belly aching, already! Y'all finally get a soundly skilled, hardworking US champion who doesn't talk out his ass.."
Lash absorbs the hate that filters in, closing his eyes for a second. He grinned sarcastically, his arms spread wide, gesturing for Georgia to get louder. They unhappily oblige..
Lash Donohue: "Finally y'all got yaselves a US champion who isn't some backwater mud show outlaw wannabe freakin' fish outta water.."
Lash laughs heartily as Albany also BOO him heartily. It only got louder as Lash grinned and used his middle finger to wipe a fake laughter tear from the corner of his eye..
Lash Donohue: "Finally, this fickle redneck ass company with these fickle redneck ass fans has a technically sound, charismatic workhorse champion who knows what day it is, and you cousin f.."
The BOOing had grown to almost nuclear levels, but Lash caught himself. He closed his eyes, centering himself before he continued..
Lash Donohue: "Grrr. You STILL wanna complain, you assholes?! Fine! This is why I call y'all out! This is why I called out Areano!!"
Lash grinned cockily, taking up the US title and placing it over his shoulder, slapping the plate proudly several times..
Lash Donohue: "And this is why I call out YOU, Erik Holland!"
Lash's face grows cold. Serious.
Lash Donohue: "You goddamn RIGHT I thought you were cool once, Holland. Of freakin' course I think a dood who plays his own game no matter what and doesn't give a rat's ass is somewhat inspirational.."
The fans had grown sedate while Lash's demeanor grew ever more serious..
Lash Donohue: "I was once naive as two motherfuckers.."
There's a faint BOO as the corner of Lash's mouth broke into a sarcastic grin..
Lash Donohue: "You were too good to acknowledge my rookie self, Holland. Not so much as a freakin' HELLO in return. In fact, I didn't get a damn bit of acknowledgement from you until you came into UWL, the so-called ultraviolet 'legend' is returning to what is currently MY house...until you realised that you're coming face to face with ME, Erik. Only NOW is my STILL rookie self good enough for your fucking majesty to acknowledge! Eat shit, my friend!"
Lash's eyes grew cold once more as he held the gleaming title close the camera..
Lash Donohue: "Well uh uhh! If you think for a second that ANY of your hollow interaction with me did you one iota of good, shove the concept up your ass! You really are steaming hot garbage, Erik Holland. You'll thankfully never come close to touching my United states championship ever again!"
The scene began to fade out here as Lash began to shadow box in the hallway, his call not being far off. Of course there is still a steady BOO filtering in from the stands..
Lash Donohue: "You're a bigger shitbag than I could ever aspire to be, and your reign of Erik-squeaks-by mediocrity is up tonight. The Bury-Go-Round tour ain't stopping here.."
With a final cackle of cocky laughter and a final angry BOOO from the Georgian fans, this segment fades.